A DeSantis Do-Over
A governor who is proficient at his defined roles during a disaster created the best campaign ad possible. Wait: Republicans nominated Donald Trump again. Wearing out gold crayons is not much of a consolation prize for avoiding a leader who would actually reverse Joe Biden’s anciently dreadful policies instead of merely ranting how much they suck.
Being over three decades younger doesn’t change how Ron DeSantis is the grownup. The professional hurricane effect reverser almost makes me violate my rule of loathing everyone who’s ever run for office. He’s distinct from Trump in that he gets productive things done without running off his mouth. Other than being the exact opposite, he’s the same. Florida’s executive is a different sort of Republican in that he doesn’t deserve to be demonized.
Being responsible for about 105 percent of jobs created during the inflation era sounds mathematically impossible. But the numbers make way more sense than trying to get rich by printing money faster than prices rise. Tag teaming with Texas to create prosperity pockets shows why Democrats loathe the free market competition of federalism.
The meddlers only break inventory with their clumsy gestures. By contrast, governors who are successful beyond winning elections notably don’t do much unless yielding counts. Letting people set up shop requires respecting others to make rational choices, which rules out all of one party and one notable member of the other.
Contemporary Republican theory involves Trump planning the economy while standing in front of an American flag. Another term is bound to be less underwhelming, what with all the practice he had in the first. Loving the country and its government is the new style of red-capped patriotism. The joy of no longer having to make decisions means all worries have been taken from you. There will again be no money to worry about spending. You’ll lose it through tariffs and not inflation, so remain grateful.
Primary voters went in a different direction, namely the same one. The lunatic screaming on the corner has undoubtedly improved his case. The bum has name recognition. All participants recognized the panhandling displaced carnival barker even though getting canned was detrimental to his grasp on reality.
The establishment sets up shop in the most surprising locations. Trump primary and general election voters settled for comfort, which is ironic for someone who was supposed to be the ultimate disruptor. The Boomer mentality leads to those infected being so frightened of change that they went with the one person who had already attempted to manage. Very adaptable geezers who are scared to use a tablet with its lack of a number touchpad still choose heads of state. It’s the ultimate Trump generation move to stick with their raging messiah. Johnny Carson didn’t offer as much familiarity.
Politics is always evolving. Take how conservatism is now classified as crudely restating some sort of description Trump vaguely remembers hearing. A different Republican could calmly explain why, say, the same government that efficiently nuked two cities might not be the best option for providing nurturing patient care. The figurative healthy choice might even feature a better system that doesn’t involve presidents declaring how much medicine should cost. Buying your own from companies begging for your business is way less costly than free.
Liberals can relax about their precious agencies. Government will still ruin your insurance just like it will your retirement. Ranting without effect doesn’t even feel cathartic.
Letting you live as you wish overcomes 473-degree Saint Patrick’s Days. Florida offers a natural disadvantage for those who think humidity is the foe of humanity. The only thing that can survive a state hotter than the Sun that heats it is mosquitos that can take down drones. Yet escaping to a swamp with borders is appealing to those who prefer four seasons over not being able to afford garments for any of them.
The Cold War has turned civil. Its losers are uncivil. The Tax Stasi has inspired oppressed comrades to flee from New York like they’re hopping the Berlin Wall. Maybe building a copy would help. General Secretary Kathy Hochul dreams of confiscating even more taxpayer money, and she can’t do so while state lines are figurative. The border fence would be about the only building project in the erstwhile Empire State. You don’t oppose construction work, do you?
The adult’s future cleanup task just gets harder. Spending heedlessly was the election’s winner platform no matter which person got the most electoral votes. Choosing a party these days comes down to which style of unfathomable debt you prefer.
There are better final pairings than a Republican who acts like a Democrat versus a Democrat who does the same. Common interests are unhelpful when they’re shared by aspiring tyrants who want to shred more of your productivity. Bipartisan amity isn’t always welcome. An alternative to both would be someone who got into politics to minimize its impact. But he might never have hosted a game show.
Trump’s stubborn dedication to being all talk shows his fearless commitment in a way. Faking being bold conforms with pretending to be conservative. Next, you’ll tell me that the alleged baron’s empire consists of a handful of despised towers in Manhattan along with a warehouse full of board games too classy to sell to rubes.
Claiming so makes it so. At least, it better. Otherwise, the second Trump era will brought nothing but hollow victories, and surely there’s no precedent for that. The sunken cost fallacy must be the only unwise financial decision by the person who
the most overtly political candidate of our times. Speaking of which, when do said times roll over?
Letting the craziest state continue to thrive will continue to be better than ad time. DeSantis will still buy it as a formality, as we can’t imagine a world where political ad producers must seek useful employment. But doing his job allows others to do theirs. The example should be taken nationally. A president who does instead of saying will sound like a dream soon.
