Those making life worse have to claim they’ve kept it from being the worst. The bumbling saviors’ delusion is based in self-interest, as they’re not about to stop making you be rich and happy by decree. There’s no other choice for the those ruining in our name but to claim they saved us. I suppose they could stop trying to put out fires with lighter fluid, especially considering we saw them loitering suspiciously with matches.

The agony would only feel more intense. Oh, really? Everyone’s noticed everything already sucks inherently. The truly decent try to remove as much suckiness by promoting liberty at every chance. At least then humans can attempt to trade for various items and services that offer relief. By contrast, acting like ghastly bits on this stupid planet in a crummy universe can be eliminated exacerbates the problems allegedly being addressed. They’re too smart to learn an ironic lesson.

Solitary confinement kept everyone safe, aside from sickness spreading, economy sputtering, and despondency multiplying. Hooky is to prevent illness. You didn’t barf up your lungs because you were given a day off to enjoy. Skipping nine times was just the start. Meek truants didn’t maximize the time at Cubs games or crashing parades. Being scared is such a Cameron move.

So maybe everyone was too broke to live it up while the virus strolled about at will. Being forced to face the wall was for the best, as subjects were blessed to spend time at home contemplating how blessed the were to have loving politicians who ordered idling. Instead, uncooperative ingrates just thought about how woeful it felt to be deprived of purpose. Liberals govern on emotion, so they can enjoy the results.

The results sucked, according to those who caused them. Nursing statists got every restriction they could’ve wanted, and the corpse count met their most horrifying case. We were told the bodies would pile if humans were allowed to work and breathe freely. In reality, inhaled carnage happened while we hid from it.

Healing from a beating provides a chance to appreciate health. The pandemic was merely an emergency where those who check under their beds for the unvaccinated Bogeyman predicted awful outcomes then made them true by attempting to avoid them. Presume they’re inept and not diabolical, as that’s part of maintaining good faith in politics. Gun crime in purportedly controlled Chicago should have the same red alert status.

Do you want to be even poorer? Be glad you’re merely broke. The economy is nothing more than offering what one has for what one wants. Arrogant dolts who think it’s something more make it nothing. They’re saving us from even more depression, both in finances and feelings. We stubbornly persist in suspecting they prevent bliss in the first place.

Existence could be so much worse without their assistance. Interferers inspire Americans to dream big. Obamanomics was based in the assurance that we’d be really broke without government compensating for its policy. Its namesake’s flunky continues the misdirected interdiction. The economy will take off once Joe Biden spends your money.

Causing problems they purport to cure is one way for financial quacks to stay in business. Infecting patients is seen with federal intervention in, say, the mortgage business. Making lenders let people who can’t afford homes attempt to buy them somehow didn’t increase ownership. Federal takeovers of the industries they choose will cause even more agony as long as free will is permitted.

Insurance is not health care, which you can confirm by getting sick. The distinction is as wide as planning to get bypass surgery and blowing off the appointment to golf. Saying everyone has it satiates statists’ consciences. If they cared about actual results, they wouldn’t believe what they do.

Democrats commit the crimes of which they accuse others, which is an idea so simple that any Law & Order still on the air would be reluctant to have a suspect act identically. But obvious notions become staples for a reason. Take smearing private health care providers for profiting off human misery while enduring incessant commercials for federal insurance.

It’s odd they must advertise for a requirement, especially for a product so swell that it shouldn’t need compulsion. You’re supposed to buy what’s subsidized and they still can’t convince people to do so. They just need a bigger ad budget than those greedy corporations that spend their own money.

Restraints on life that reduce efficiency and joy keep you from even more harm, claim harmers. Humans would be even more miserable without supervisors’ beneficent assistance. They’re taking care of our everyday affairs, which is apparently why we have a government in the first place. Selfless politicians bother us kindly while asking for nothing more than about half our income. Sure, we aren’t presented with the chance to decline. But why would we even if we could?

Schemers who fail at scheming are still working on explanations for why they turn gold into mud. They can only claim hazards would be poisonous without their supervision. The excuse is understandable in the sick way the getaway driver tries to come up with a story about being carjacked. The only better outcome would be if they stopped mucking up our affairs by trying to address them in the first place. Maybe they just enjoy lying.

Cranky as a lifestyle choice.