Hating Republicans no matter what is a popular habit amongst the tolerantly loving. Unity paired with bipartisanship leads to treating anyone who finds the capital gains tax rate excessive as a villain on par with Lex Luthor or that really mean German guy.

The next nominee better know to brace for the calumny. Acting as if suited goon Donald Trump was a unique threat requiring special focused resistance negates how Democrats treat any foe as a religious villain. That sadly doesn’t mean any of the lunatics who run Iran. The lack of historical perspective is innate to those calling for the system that lost the Cold War.

Contempt for a uniquely unpleasant president would’ve felt more authentic had they not applied it indiscriminately to every Republican ever. It’s okay to hate monsters in human costumes, you see.

Oh so tolerant liberals justify seething anger toward anyone who dares disagree by framing other stances as those of mass-murdering anti-recycling bigots. You could calmly point out the death toll from Planned Parenthood’s drive-thru windows and Andrew Cuomo’s bossiness, but that’d just make you even more of a hater. It’s your fault for thinking those who disagree are merely misguided.

Spread love by despising everyone connected to the other party, which negates their claim that the failed vodka pitchman represented a singular menace. Consistency is yet another area for improvement. Those just stopping frothing now couldn’t get Republicans to join their Donald-bashing group even if they also didn’t care for him. We’ll loathe Trump over here.

Those who thought Joe Biden’s predecessor was not only rude and miserable but also a giant-government fetishist remain wary because they know any other party member would also be viewed as a garbage pile by the very empathetic embodiments of civility. Imagine if, say, Scott Walker had prevailed instead of the reality show ringleader, and not just to give your brain a moment of imagined bliss to distract from hideous reality. I’m certain the embodiment of mildness wouldn’t have been called the secret leader of orphan blood-drinking white supremacists. Hitler mustaches sure do get drawn on many non-Trump Republicans.

Professional haters play the Mad Libs of politics where they fill in proper names of any Republicans to loathe. Libs is not in fact short for liberals. The warmly welcoming will soon have to change their dating profiles to announce no Ron DeSantis supporters. Swipe left in honor of their politics.

The particularly rational faction thinks anyone who wants any federal cut of any kind is a homophobic honorary Koch brother who doesn’t double mask. Demonizing provides a distraction from learning just what government does, which is to say nothing well. Meanwhile, it’s actually statists’ own views which spread misery in lieu of prosperity. Have they tried self-loathing?

Those specializing in the consistent application of contempt wonder why nobody gets along with them. It must be mean Republicans not opening their hearts. Intolerant demons who disagree cannot be allowed to hold employment or live in society.

Notoriously shortsighted Washington aficionados may have forgotten how they treated Mitt Romney, who’s offensive in the same way two percent milk is. Allegedly noble Democrats hold up the Utah senator as a model of decorum because he occasionally agrees with them and since he’s no longer a serious threat. But not too many elections ago, the same high-minded individuals lied about him during his presidential run like they were training to slander Brett Kavanaugh.

The type of Republican isn’t limited to two, which should be clear to the side that allegedly values endless market options. Condemning those allegedly working on behalf of the shadowy establishment remains popular amongst dwindling fans of the ejected insurrectionist buffoon.

But primary voters don’t have to choose between a polite liberal and rude liberal. Imagine finding someone quiet and principled. The contender is going to be called a monstrous orphan-puncher no matter what, so get someone who can explain why a flat tax would help everyone.

Panicky arguments against treating Trump with dignity would’ve been more convincing if they didn’t go to Red Alert DEFCON 1 for every supposed Republican threat to the poor and world peace. Democrats who don’t remember how much pain their policies cause forget their atrocious treatment of opposing presidents.

The relentlessly hopeful side cast Ronald Reagan as Adolf Satan, largely because his successes at illustrating how liberalism never works. It’s in the nature of those who let emotions guide their decisions to shriek irrationally. If you’ve invested faith that the freaking government improves health care, you’re bound to slime anyone who might prove you wrong.

Good luck to those trying to get along with anyone who wants them to get along to a rather hot and uncomfortable afterlife. Whoever tries to replace Kamala Harris and the president is going to be demonized under any conditions. We may as well get decent items on the agenda instead of the pretend action after the genuine mouth-running preferred by the last Republican standard-bearer.

Trump was indeed a distinct irritant in that he achieved nothing aside from spending like a liberal. The failed rebellion general was an unparalleled scourge in his way, as he reminded his most ardent foes that what they believe fails. They hated his guts without realizing why.

Cranky as a lifestyle choice.