Andrew Cuomo has succeeded if making John Wayne Gacy look like an amateur was the goal. Killer clowns are apparently a natural Democratic constituency. The dashing shepherd’s corpse count way even outpaces cultist party member Jim Jones.

It only takes any attention span and capacity for perception to know the erstwhile Empire State’s putzing generalissimo screwed up while projecting authority. That disqualifies his party and journalists, to be redundant. Are slavish fans of autocrats naturally ignorant, or were they unwilling to examine their hero’s Thanos-style snapping? Yes.

Every day with the virus brings a new discovery. The one certainty from the start was that putting virus victims in nursing homes constituted an idea so ghastly that only Captain Andrew could’ve thought it wise. Only the governor was sicker than residents. The ensuing unsurprising carnage was like giving hard seltzer to sorority girls then acting surprised when they get tipsy.

We’re clearly dealing with a psychopath. His worshipers list it as his best quality. New York’s Reaper seduced the same sort of people who marry serial killers. That brings us to the media, which apparently has not gotten around to apologizing for the elder carnage caused by calling a fascist buffoon the nation’s savior.

Press conference charts looked like they were packed with science. He never wheeled one out showing the results of his decisions. Killing one economy was nothing compared to the elderly tally.

Sure, he’s as arrogant as he is inept. But at least he’s as inept as he is awful. You may have heard politics is a field that attracts slightly soulless individuals. Cuomo is an egregious example even among the useless category.

Nobody even remotely familiar with New York can be shocked that a chronic harasser coped with his own failures by trying to bully those who notice. Some failures are nice people, while there are many successful jerks. New York enjoys the worst of both worlds with the death toll to prove it.

Screwing up life is nothing new for an inept dynasty’s latest installment. Mario’s brat showed a talent for colossal incompetence when he melted global finances by pimping subprime mortgages as fellow conscience-free predator Bill Clinton’s Housing and Urban Development secretary, which as a reminder involves selling houses to people who can’t afford them. One worldwide disaster wasn’t enough.

New York has suffered as if it were your grandma residing in one of the state’s nursing homes. Giving virtually limitless sovereignty to those who crave it created results that weren’t quite progressive.

Filtering every decision and dollar through glamorous metropolis Albany turns out as well as expected. There’s yet one more experiment whose conclusion defies the executive.

But he sounded reassuring to a particular brand of sucker. We were told that Cuomo was calmly scientific as he was searching for more closet space to hide grandparent corpses. A Clue-level surfeit of victims seems like relevant evidence.

A micromanaged totalitarian lockdown doesn’t help, either. Government failed in every sense. Cuomo is consistent.

Deciding what percentage of capacity restaurants are allowed will save us, according to a messianic monster and his zombie adherents. As a reminder, New York’s bar patrons still have to order food with drinks in an unaware self-parody of nanny state hassling. Bothering you for your own benefit is a lesson that should and won’t apply to an oafishly fiendish government messing with your money.

Follow the science, according to those who headed in the opposite direction. Liberal spenders of your money whose economic policies cause devastation every time they’re tried surely must be correct about how a virus spreads.

Statist enthusiasts figured that a Democratic governor simply had to know what he was doing. All those numbers he recited felt official. The same rubes who fell for a quack’s pernicious healing regiment think Bill Nye is a certified expert and treat Neil deGrasse Tyson as the embodiment of knowledge.

Thank a thorough failure for an argument against regular overreach during non-pandemic eras. A hideous example obviously wasn’t Cuomo’s intention, so inadvertent examples to avoid is the best case for his legacy. A crisis is a moment for checking power, not handing car keys to tweakers while expecting them to park safely. I’m certain emergency incursions won’t be abused, like, say, an executive drunk on dominance confiscating liquor licenses of his critics.

Acting like a dictator didn’t even make closures run on time. Cuomo shut down everything but the virus, whose rampage will only be stopped by ample vacancy. The state was already suffering from a similarly malicious contagion, namely politicians making residents’ decisions. You can guess just how pleasantly they turned out by how much elbow room New Yorkers enjoy.

It didn’t take a Law & Order detective to notice way beforehand that America’s horrific victim count began in Cuomo’s domain. He’d shriek that calling it the New York virus is racist.

There have been quite a few funerals resulting from refusing to examine a fool’s terrible policies, or at least there would’ve been had commemorating the deceased in person not be prohibited. Adulating Satan’s minion as a saint made a tough year fun for the truest believers. He usually only kills businesses.

Maybe listen to those who aren’t cheering. They’re tougher to hear. A lack of grandstanding about science is odd to those who think making a show of it is part of the process. It’s in fact about challenging assumptions. Listening to scientists means picking a few of them as prophets, according to the ignorantly smug who demand more shutdowns and maskings in response to their diktats not helping in the first place. Like every other governmental failure, they just weren’t tried hard enough.

Dissent is the most scientific approach possible, especially from a maniacal messianic lawyer who’s thoroughly wrong despite his bossy assurances to the contrary. The same people who noticed a wannabe dictator and real serial killer’s countless failings were labeled enemies of facts. As with Cuomo, it’s all backward. There would’ve been way fewer victims if his fans noticed a year ago.

Cranky as a lifestyle choice.