Social Security Box Unlocked
We’re all set to follow through until doom arrives. There are no fears that the most awful annuity possible for individuals and the nation will be touched, so don’t worry. The future is defined, which certainly doesn’t mean it’s promising.
The inability to distinguish between parties is as confusing as the utter lack of return on an involuntary investment. Dismantling the colossal ripoff that is Social Security has something in common with meager payouts, namely lack of interest.
You can tell Donald Trump’s diehards are closeted liberals because they presume ending Social Security means condemning senior citizens to foraging in the Subway dumpster. But retaining the worst sort of income redistribution is making geezers as poor as the nation.
Trimming around the edges beats around the bush. It was mildly fun watching that Twitter guy make nonworking workers justify their pay for the first time ever. The term “useless federal employee” implies that some are helpful. Firing some of them is as fun as it is frugal.
But removing waste is an aspirin for a cancer patient. Elon Musk’s brief efficiency push didn’t address looming doom. Entitlements have doomed us to an unfathomable debt burden since nobody in the White House seems to notice. But at least nobody can retire comfortably.
The antisocial insecure scheme is the prototypical government program. Liberals cheer. Alleged conservatives shouldn’t. Your retirement plan could consist of trying to convince an exotic dancer to love you and take you in, and it’s be a better deal than Social Security. You’s also have way more fun than with Washington’s mandated teasing. But people who want to blow money as they choose don’t have a faction, which is why both unfortunate candidates demanded preserving the scheme. We’ve got one party. Trump enthusiasts warned us they’re protecting us from that very outcome if you’re not yet tired of empty promises.
Let’s retire the tiresome era where we have exactly zero options for voting or saving.
Having a choice that doesn’t feature our dumb government or officeholders is a way better plan than Social Security. During these exhausting working years, we’re only one party short of having an option.
I wish Trump lied. The vow to preserve the embodiment of careless federal caretaking is one he should break. Promises of preposterous gains are why he finds Social Security appealing. Democrats whose primary addition is scaring people pretended Trump wanted to modify the ultimate Ponzi scheme. Ineffectiveness in direct contrast to bombast is his signature. But inertia stalls the alleged overthrower of the establishment.
Transitioning to a private contribution system seems like an obvious goal for the political grouping that ostensibly opposes coercively rotten bargains that are anything but. One might think the purported commercial titan of a president would’ve used his extensive business knowledge to realize government sucks. Yet the business genius whose idea of dominant innovation involves slapping his name in gold on garbage is inherently attracted to the concept of claiming something lousy helps.
Take the same money deducted from every paycheck and put it in a mutual fund. There: I solved the Social Security crisis. Skittish potential investors would get better results from sticking sums in a savings account or cigar box. A zero percent return outpaces Treasury payouts. Like income tax returns, you’re just getting what had been yours back. This time, it just takes way longer.
No magical spell will make Washington manage money well or at all. Pretending everyone has a Gringotts Bank-style vault has led to fortunes disappearing. It’s not a clever magic trick. The difference between Social Security and Harry Potter is the latter is a known fantasy.
“Gullible Boomers” is redundant. America’s parents are still opening virus attachments in emails. Pliable elders take a break from announcing you shouldn’t accept Facebook friend requests purporting to be from them on account of how they were hacked to proclaim they must get their dole every month. Otherwise, there’ll be riots spoking out from Old Country Buffet.
Your lockbox doesn’t lock. The worst possible deal shouldn’t shock anyone remotely familiar with federal shenanigans. Washington ripping off everyone forced to interact with it might be worth noticing one of these decades. But the scammed are too busy waiting for their payments to arrive.
The retirement sham should be retired. Gentle dupes are convinced they’re getting back what they paid in, which would be sweet if it weren’t so pathetic. Getting junkies hooked on aid is the costliest part. Squandered trillions are a lot, too.
Embracing entitlements revolves around the notion that government cares for them. A lifetime that should’ve been spent collecting evidence that the precise opposite occurs is instead spent killing time until collecting checks. Please don’t offer direct deposit: that computer voodoo is as scary as app downloading.
The notion that greedy people don’t care about future generations is popular amongst those demanding their handouts as America’s bankrupted. The eternal demand to get shorted nearly as bad as the delusion that they weren’t paying a tax.
Arsonists condemn flames. Old-timers tell sob stories about pensioners who have only Social Security to rely on from those demonic enemies of mathematics who created the very woeful situation. Short-sighted confiscators can’t even conceive of a universe where humans plan ahead.
Dependency is a self-fulfilling prophecy. When it comes to a retirement plan that involves no planning, controlling people with regularly-dispensed pittances continues through the end.
