The Fake Fight of His Life
This round of pretend combat impresses fans the most. Punching the air while promising knockouts is why octagon-based grappling is so popular. The same fuming zealots who think unsubstantiated bluster is the core of fighting applaud what may be the final chance to see their pugilistic hero pummel his shadow. A close election unfortunately let Donald Trump engage in his specialties.
People don’t change, which is less reassuring than you’d think. Take the example set by the head of state, who’s been so exhausting in kvetching that he can’t even convince people to take his side when he could have a case. It’s tough to care if he’s right. Karma finally noted his obsession with domination regardless of whether there’s enough fraud to make him a victim. Being undignified to the end is how to show Mitt Romney who’s boss.
Please give more undeserved powers to governments unable to perform basic jobs. Your mistake was expecting those in charge to be prepared to count just because there was an election. It’s tricky to figure out amounts. Twenty-four beers sounds like more than 12, but I’ll count empty bottles in the morning to make sure.
You’re telling me people who can’t complete the simplest of pie charts were unprepared to fight a virus? Harassing the healthy as the sick croaked is as ghastly as it is unsurprising. Entities that are still haven’t taken inventory for certain want to commandeer your health care.
Follow your beloved president’s example and carp about the useless media doing something irrelevant. Calling races that are still racing is indeed the sort of scummy self-important move journalists adore. Failed English majors are compelled to make themselves seem important while overcompensating for insecurity caused by irrelevance. Speaking of which, their calls have no effect, or at least shouldn’t unless CNN decides how the future will go. John King thinks you should have Pizza Rolls for dinner.
The channel changed the vote, then? Freaking about Fox News claiming someone won Arizona who may have not is like me at home shrieking at quarterbacks for not reading defenses properly like I did from the couch. It’s presently trendy to worry arithmetic will be affected by networks who can’t accumulate many viewers. Anyone who doesn’t race to the polls to vote after dinner because they believe a cable news projection shows precisely why we have an Electoral College.
You should be far more ticked at a president undermining establishments than at channels he berates for noticing. Reaping what’s sown is unappealing to the guy who couldn’t make money spinning roulette wheels. An unconvincing case despite a possible point reflects a lifetime of ingratitude despite being handed everything, or because of it.
Look at this crazy outsider ranting against the system from the Oval Office. Decorum would presently be useful, like when the freaking president could say he remains confident about prevailing while doing everything to ensure Americans have a president who humbly accepts the responsibility of winning fairly. Then he’ll admit his critics are correct that he’s had some management lapses. Ranting about numbers he’s invented doesn’t count as respectable.
Trump-era America didn’t need another example of the lunkheaded folly of binary thinking. It’s entirely possible that there’s both shady tallying and that the potential victim is a petulant child highlighting irregularities that don’t technically exist.
Two other things can be simultaneously true, like Joe Biden being a smug dolt who’s spent an endless political career being wrong about everything and Trump being the worst possible defender of the opposite values. Don’t tell Laura Ingraham that one thing doesn’t make something unrelated true unless you want smoke to billow out her ears.
We don’t need unfairness to test character but have it constantly, anyway. This world sucks, as anyone residing on it for more than five minutes has noticed. Take who got to the final voting round and tell me justice prevails. But responding to crummy scenarios is a good portion of our lifetimes. Certain presidents use the chance to project irritability.
Calculating every vote is apparently trickier than a healthy relationship. A counting machine is too futuristic in this primitive era of glowing pocket screens powered by space beams. The determination of who got more support when everyone participating registers an opinion is the last thing in this stupid-ass reality that should be plagued with trickiness. A Sesame Street lesson is the last thing that should be political.
Republicans wish they had a guy who doesn’t fight to finish the bout. Establishment insider George W. Bush possessed the nerve to stand up to election shenanigans, and dooming Al Gore to star in the most undeserved Oscar imaginable is even more impressive compared to the incumbent flailing without effect.
Nobody serious takes Trump seriously, even when he has a serious gripe. I blame the fake news media for reporting he didn’t win when he said he did. The Rocky V of presidents will finally learn his lesson, by which I mean he’ll wail like a toddler who had a 5-hour Energy if he loses or wins. The judges are all biased.
